Hearing things or just extremely good sense of hearing? And..?

Ok, well I do have mental health issues, although I haven't been diagnosed with anything yet, but it seems like it is something fairly serious.


I seem to show a lot of signs of schizophrenia, except for strong hallucinations or voices. By that I mainly mean that I have a very hard time telling whether I dreamed something or if it happened in reality, and I have created an actual other world inside my head and lived in it, causing me to forget to go to college, freak out when I do, and basically ruin my whole life..





Anyway, now I have noticed that I hear things a lot, never very loud, often the sound of voices, but like as if I'm standing out side a crowded place, or just random muffled sounds, like as if I'm next to someone who has headphones on. There seems to be something.. different about them, and I live in a place where sounds like this are extremely unlikely.


I also do hear voices when I am falling asleep, I would hear people calling my name, saying things about me, whispering so I couldn't quite make it out, and sometimes I hear someone screaming my name, or my mother shouting at me when I know she isn't there. But only when I am just waking up or going to sleep.





The small noises are now when I am awake, and I wonder if I may just have such a good sense of hearing that I can hear low level noise that nobody else hears?





I also want to say that I have small hallucination sometimes, flies, thinking there's something behind me, if I'm having anxiety (which is alot) the walls can fluctuate. I kind of think in colours sometimes, and I can make things float and move if I stare at them, like, if I space out I can alter everything around me, chage colours, stop sounds..





I have split in to two minds, and sometimes I think I'm making it all up, I live with my mum, and she doesn't know anything about me being ill, so I've learned how to act like someone else, and it confuses my head too much. I have one side of me going to psychiatrists, getting screwed up, ruining everything, and then the other side which is me with my mum, acting sweet, innocent, pretending. ';Yes I went to college today. It was great. I just love life.';


I don't even know what to think. Everything's so weird.





I just want to go to sleep, and sleep and sleep, but not die, just live in this other world. It's slipping in to life now though, I constantly feel like I've just woken up, and I want to get out, but at the same time, I don't. Because if I'm better, I'll have nothing.





With all this, I've seen people, teachers, counsellors, therapists, but you tell them things, pour out your soul, cry for help, but they just say ';Ok times up byee..'; :|


I haven't even had medication, even though my ';daily life'; is altered so much that I can't even live at all.





So erm, thoughts?Hearing things or just extremely good sense of hearing? And..?
Consider seeing a Psychologist who is well experienced with


';Dissociative Disorders'; Your symptoms are leaning in that direction.


Do be aware that in the mental health field, there is a segment of


specialists who doubt the existence and validity of Dissociative Disorders


or DID Dissociative Identity Disorder. You may have some searching to do to find a qualified practitioner who ';knows their stuff'; and can actually deal with it.