Once you realise your emotional problem - where do u start to fix YOURSELF?? (without counsellors etc)?

i was hurt by a boyfriend years ago, i was 16 and was totally in ';puppy love'; wit him.. then one day he phoned me and broke up with me, not only over the phone, but for no reason!!! which is the worst thing you can do to someone because every reason possible runs through your mind? was i too fat? was i not pretty enough? etc etc and ever since then i have been going for men less that i deserve, and im sure i do it cos i no deep down it cant go further than a kiss although i convince myself it will!! and they always end up walking away? and i get hurt! so i know now what my problem is, is that im scared of relationships, and being hurt like i was when i was 16, your teen forming years!!! i recently met a guy who is gorgeous!! nice looking decent guy, ones that we as girls are always keeping our eyes open for!! and it hit me in the face ';i dont deserve him'; and i asked mysefl but why?? so my problem came flashing to the forefront of my brain :) so where do i go from here? how do i move on? how do i begin?Once you realise your emotional problem - where do u start to fix YOURSELF?? (without counsellors etc)?
Nothing is ever 100% sure except ';death and taxes';as some famous historian once said. So, yes, it's possible this guy may not be worth it, or, simply that he may not fall in love with you (that doesn't make him a bad person) But what is true is that if you don't try from the beginning you have already lost. But if you try you might win, or, you might lose. Failure is when one doesn't even try. I have been there myself know about being stuck with all the walls I built up to protect my heart. But I did try and now I have been married for three years to a wonderful man. Sometimes I don't think I deserve him because I've always had low self-esteem but that turns me immedieately to God. Yes, to God. He must love us so much that in the end things do work out for us. I've been through that puppy love and infatuation phase and boy does it hurt so much. Once I remember I wrote a guy a letter to invite him to the military ball and then he told his friend, ';Why didn't you tell me she was ugly?'; I started crying right then and there. I always thought I was so hideous. But God always knows what he's doing. For example, this guy was nothing but a player going around breaking hearts. Had he liked me, I'd've been in deep trouble. So, quoting Garth Brooks, sometimes ';I thank God for unanswered prayers';. But, I didn't thank God until 20 years later, when I met the man God had reserved for me. If you are lucky, and this is the man God wants for you, then you shall see things resolve on their own. If he is not for you, then, just be patient. But do try to work for it knowing that the end result may hurt you, or, may make you so happy. Either way, it will be a learning experience you'll have forever that will lead you to the next best thing in your life. And remember, being in love, having those feelings of being in cloud 9 is already winning. Because when you start to put up walls, it will take you a long, long, long time to ever be on cloud 9 again. And that is worse, to not feel anything at all. That's like being dead. So, go for it. If you go for it, you may win big! But if you build up walls, eventually, not even you can bring down those walls of protection and yes, your heart won't ever be broken (because it wont' feel) but it will dead because not feeling is like being dead. A rock doesn't feel pain but it doesn't feel love either.Once you realise your emotional problem - where do u start to fix YOURSELF?? (without counsellors etc)?
Go to www.emofree.com Download the free manual and work on this issue yourself.
A useful start for you is to think more of the person you are attracted to and spend less time on yourself. Take more interest in the one you care for, learn to listen to their hopes, dreams, and problems, be a sympathetic friend, and let them know you want their happiness - develop ';empathy.'; Find out the things that you are both happy to be doing, like the same kind of music and books. The important step is to blend the two characters or personalities and become one.





Appearances are okay, look nice, dress nice, and bring out your pleasant side. Don't try to judge yourself or your looks because your special friend will do that for you!





There's only so much you can do and if there's a unique attraction between both of you then Nature will find a way for a compatible union.